


operation kick hawkmoth's ass

by m3owww



Series: social media shenanigans [1]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Bad Parent Gabriel Agreste, Chatting & Messaging, Chloe KNOWS, Chloé Bourgeois Redemption, F/M, Friendship, Group chat, Hawkmoth has terrible fashion sense, IDENTITY SHENANIGANS, Is there a plot? Who knows, Kim is kind of dumb, Lesbian Chloé Bourgeois, Probably Crack, Sporadic Updates, Team Bonding, also nobody knows ryuko's identity because i said so, and a new identity, but we love him anyways, chatfic, chloe gets a redemption, i still can't tag, introducing Multimouse and Aspik!, she's honeybee now, there is now a plot!, this is a raging dumpster fire of chaos, update: there are now TWO dumpster fires of chaos!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:21:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24432769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/m3owww/pseuds/m3owww
Summary: #rulesLadybug:1. NO DISCLOSING ANY INFORMATION PERTAINING TO YOUR SECRET IDENTITIES!!!Ladybug:2. If you do find out someone else’s identity, let me know asap so we can work it out.Ladybug:3. This chat was created so we could get in contact with each other in civilian form in case of emergencies. Don’t spam or bother with unnecessary texts.Ladybug:Why do I feel like that last rule is already being disregarded?
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe, Chloé Bourgeois & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug & Nino Lahiffe
Series: social media shenanigans [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1843312
Comments: 122
Kudos: 518





	1. the beginning

**Author's Note:**

> this is my attempt at writing crack. I have plans for this fic that will probably get me nowhere.
> 
> Updates will be sporadic because I keep on falling for different ships, but I'll try my best.

**[Admin] Ladybug** has added **ChatNoir** to the chat!

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **RenaRouge** to the chat!

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **Carapace** to the chat!

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **Honeybee** to the chat!

**[Admin] Ladybug** renamed the chat ‘ **o** **peration kick hawkmoth’s ass** ’

**ChatNoir** renamed themselves **PurrfectlyPawsome**.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** Yes! A group chat!

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** does this mean I can send cat memes?

 **Ladybug** : This chat was created for professional purposes only, so I’m going to establish some ground rules.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** aww bugaboo whyyyy

* * *

**#rules**

**Ladybug:** 1\. NO DISCLOSING ANY INFORMATION PERTAINING TO YOUR SECRET IDENTITIES!!!

 **Ladybug:** 2\. If you do find out someone else’s identity, let me know asap so we can work it out.

 **Ladybug:** 3\. This chat was created so we could get in contact with each other in civilian form in case of emergencies. Don’t spam or bother with unnecessary texts.

 **Ladybug:** Why do I feel like that last rule is already being disregarded?

* * *

**#main**

**RenaRouge** has renamed themselves **LadyNoir4Ever**.

 **Carapace** has renamed themselves **NinjaTurtle**.

 **Honeybee** has renamed themselves **LesBEEan.**

**LadyNoir4Ever:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** OH MY GOD

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** IS THIS REAL

 **NinjaTurtle:** rena chill it’s just a group chat

 **NinjaTurtle:** i can hear u screaming from my house

 **LesBEEan:** uhhh u okay there foxy lady

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** IM IN A GROUP CHAT

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** WITH LADYBUG!!!!

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** Yeah I understand how you feel Rena. This is paw-some, being able to text m’lady in civilian form.

 **Ladybug:** yup, rule #3 is out the window.

 **Ladybug:** Anyway, I have an announcement to make.

 **LesBEEan:** we’re listening

 **LesBEEan:** or watching, i guess

 **Ladybug:** you all are getting your miraculouses permanently!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **NinjaTurtle:** that’s awesome dude!

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** I already have my miraculous purr-manently, my lady

 **Ladybug:** -_-

 **LesBEEan:** what changed?

 **Ladybug:** Since I’m the Guardian now, I decide the rules.

 **Ladybug:** and I want you guys to be able to show up at the scene without one of us leaving the fight to get your miraculous and track you down

 **Ladybug:** that was getting really inconvenient.

 **Ladybug:** Anyways, expect a visit from either me or Chat tonight with your jewelry.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** yes! thank you ladybug!

 **NinjaTurtle:** thanks dude

 **NinjaTurtle:** i mean ladybug

 **Ladybug:** You can call me dude, Carapace. I don’t mind.

 **NinjaTurtle:** cool

 **NinjaTurtle:** thanks dude 

* * *

(2:19 am)

 **Ladybug:** I swear to FUCKING GOD HAWKMOTH I’M GOING TO KILL YOU

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** m’lady?

 **Ladybug:** akuma near the arc de triomphe. Bring the whole crew.

 **LesBEEan:** I’ll bee there soon

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** ETA seven mins

 **NinjaTurtle:** on my way.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** Honeybee, was that a bee pun?

 **LesBEEan:** I’m sorry, honeybee isn’t here right now. Leave a message after the tone. Beeeeeeep.

 **Ladybug:** guys. The fight.

* * *

(4: 32 am)

 **Ladybug:** when we find and unmask hawkmoth

 **Ladybug:** y’all are getting in line behind me

 **Ladybug:** i call dibs on kicking his sorry ass first

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** wow. being full time is so much harder

 **NinjaTurtle:** it’s been one fight

 **NinjaTurtle:** and i already miss not having to get up at ungodly hours

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** I have never felt that sensation ☹

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** I get up really early either way, so losing a couple hours doesn’t really make a difference unless it happens a couple days in a row

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** wow im sorry

 **LesBEEan:** I’m trying to sleep shut the fuck up

 **Ladybug:** sorry Honeybee

 **LesBEEan:** I officially hate Hawkmoth more than Gabriel Agreste.

 **LesBEEan:** am calling dibs on second after LB

(6:38 pm)

 **Ladybug:** don’t forget guys! We have patrol tonight!

 **Ladybug:** usually, chat and I have a rotating schedule, but since we have more heroes now, we want to add you into the loop as well

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** Patrol is a paw-some way to stay in shape and enjoy the fresh air! Also, you guys can get used to your powers since you haven’t really gotten to purr-actice with them outside of battles.

 **Ladybug:** Eiffel Tower at 10 pm, everyone!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** yes! my first patrol! So excited!

 **NinjaTurtle:** rena n i will come for sure

 **LesBEEan:** i’ll bee there

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** There it is again!!!

 **LesBEEan:** buzz off.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** I don’t know whether to feel proud or insulted.

 **LesBEEan:** u can bee both, u know.

 **Ladybug:** why are there two of them now somebody help

* * *

(11:44 pm)

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** that was awesome!

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** *pawsome

 **NinjaTurtle:** dude.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 **LesBEEan:** hey LB

 **Ladybug:** yeah?

 **LesBEEan:** I was thinking

 **LesBEEan:** can we add the other temporary holders to this chat too?

 **LesBEEan:** because even tho they’re not permanent, they should have a chance to talk w the rest of us too

 **LesBEEan:** and that way we can let them kno ahead of time if they’re getting a miraculous for a battle

 **Ladybug:** that’s a great idea Honeybee!

 **Ladybug:** I’ll track them down tomorrow and have them make new accounts so I can add them.

 **Ladybug:** thanks for the suggestion!

 **LesBEEan:** i try


	2. new members

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Ladybug brings in the temporary holders for even more chaos in the group chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea how to write Luka. This becomes pretty obvious later on.

(4:16 pm)

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **Viperion** to the chat!

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **Ryuko** to the chat!

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **KingMonkey** to the chat!

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **Pegasus** to the chat!

 **[Admin] Ladybug** has added **Bunnyx** to the chat!

**Viperion** has renamed themselves **hiss**.

 **KingMonkey** has renamed themselves **MonkeyMaster.**

 **Bunnyx** has renamed themselves **ICanSeeYourFuture.**

**MonkeyMaster:** wait u can???

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** well sort of

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** I don’t have my miraculous yet so no

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** but future me can

 **hiss:** lol wut

 **Ladybug:** welcome to the group chat guys!

 **Ladybug:** there are some ground rules in the #rules section, but as number 3 is being disregarded anyway, just ignore it.

 **Ryuko:** Thank you for the invitation, Ladybug. As I have many events in my civilian life, I do not believe I will be online often.

 **Ladybug:** that’s alright Ryuko! This is mainly so you can know if you’re getting your miraculous ahead of time.

 **Pegasus:** I am almost always online. If not, I will probably respond in 15-20 minutes.

 **MonkeyMaster:** dude do u sleep at all

 **Pegasus:** I am choosing to ignore that question.

 **hiss:** uhhh just in case, I’m going to tell you that it’s not healthy.

 **Pegasus:** I am well aware of the health conditions that can be caused by fatigue and lack of sleep.

 **Pegasus:** I am just

 **Pegasus:** constantly coming up with new ideas and I have to write them down or bring them to life.

 **MonkeyMaster:** wow you sound just like my friend

 **Ladybug:** NO IDENTITY STUFF KING MONKEY!!!!!!!

 **MonkeyMaster:** right sorry LB

 **Ladybug:** why does everyone call me that?

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** heyyy we got new people!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** im rena btw

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** the #1 ladynoir shipper

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** Hey! I’m the number 1 shipper!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** u can be second u mangy alley cat

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** rude.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** anyway, I can prove I’m number one

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** I’ve read every single fic on ao3 that has LadyNoir as a tag.

 **hiss:** should I be concerned?

 **LesBEEan:** nah don’t worry he’s just like that

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** oh yeah?

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** who’s ur favorite ladynoir writer then

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** ooh I really enjoy reading LuckyLadyNoir’s works. They’re really good!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** oiagvnxc

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** I BEAT YOU!

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** ?

 **NinjaTurtle:** dude

 **NinjaTurtle:** that’s rena’s fanfic account

 **NinjaTurtle:** im with her rn and she’s literally cackling

 **ICanSeeTheFuture:** well rip

 **MonkeyMaster:** f for chat

 **hiss:** f

 **Pegasus:** f

 **LesBEEan:** f

**PurrfectlyPawsome:** **☹**

* * *

(4:42 pm)

 **Ladybug:** wow I leave for like half an hour

 **Ladybug:** and I come back to a war

 **Ladybug:** over who ships me with chat more?

 **Ladybug:** why me

 **Ladybug:** just so you guys know, there’s a guy in my civilian life that I like

 **Ladybug:** he doesn’t return my feelings, but I don’t want to be the ‘my top pick didn’t like me back so I’m going to go for the one who does like me’ kind of person

 **Ladybug:** and I don’t want chat to be a rebound. He’s too sweet for that, and deserves someone who can love him as much as he deserves

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** aww m’lady (=♡ ᆺ ♡=)

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** I don’t deserve you

 **Ladybug:** nonsense. You deserve the world.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** screenshotted omg my ship

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** but lb r u sure ur ‘other guy’ isn’t chat?

 **Ladybug:** I’m almost 100% positive. The guy in my civilian life is nothing like chat lmao

 **Ladybug:** but chat!!! Don’t change yourself to appeal to me, please

 **Ladybug:** I like you just the way you are

* * *

(5:19 pm)

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** but not enough, obviously.

_Unsend Message?_

_Message Unsent._

* * *

**Direct Messages @Pegasus @Ladybug**

(8:07 pm)

 **Pegasus:** Hello Ladybug. I have a question.

 **Ladybug:** Sure! Ask away.

 **Pegasus:** do our magical devices link to our civilian phones? I’ve never had the time to check.

 **Ladybug:** they do. That’s why I don’t need my civilian phone to alert you guys of an akuma attack. It still works if I’m transformed. The only difference is that our superhero contacts disappear. I can’t contact Chat Noir’s baton or phone.

 **Pegasus:** thank you.

 **Pegasus:** you mentioned having superhero contacts in your phone, correct?

 **Ladybug:** Yup! If I open the contacts in my yoyo, I can call the Guardian, who’s the only one that can have a civilian phone in the yoyo, or any of you guys. They’re labelled with the word ‘Ally’ next to it.

 **Pegasus:** can you see their contacts when they aren’t transformed?

 **Ladybug** : I can, but if I text them, they won’t know until the next time they transform. Calls will go to voicemail.

 **Pegasus:** alright. I have the information I need to make a hypothesis. Thank you.

 **Ladybug:** no problem!

* * *

**#akuma**

(8:56 am)

 **Ladybug:** akuma @ the Dupain-cheng bakery

 **Ladybug:** gigantitan again, with a cupcake sentimonster

 **Ladybug:** crashed straight through the top of the building when he grew, currently evacuating civilians

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** omg is marinette ok

 **LesBEEan:** omw but chat what

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** my purrincess! Marinette!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** AAAAAA ANOTHER SHIP

 **NinjaTurtle:** she means we’re coming, LB. We’re coming.

 **MonkeyMaster:** need any assistance? 😉

 **Ladybug:** nah it’s a baby we’re good but thanks

* * *

**#main**

(9:28 am)

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** so chat

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** what was that all about

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** ?

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** I’d like to know why chat has a purrincess too

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** Oh you mean Marinette!

 **hiss:** hiss

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** she’s just a friend

 **NinjaTurtle:** dude u sound just like one of my friends

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** I’m serious! I met her during the Evillustrator thing because he tried to date her and stuff, and then we just kept on hanging out at her balcony!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** sounds pretty romantic to me

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** SHE’S JUST A FRIEND

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** a very good friend

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** but JUST A FRIEND nonetheless

 **LesBEEan:** sure whatever you say chat

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** if ur also shipping marichat in spite of mari’s crush say eye

 **LesBEEan:** eye

 **NinjaTurtle:** eye

 **MonkeyMaster:** eye

 **ICanSeeTheFuture:** eye

 **Ladybug:** why on earth-

 **Pegasus:** statistically speaking, there is a 94.8% chance that chat will harbor romantic feelings for Marinette Dupain-Cheng in the future, a 97.2% chance he is already harboring feelings but hasn’t realized it yet, and a 100% chance that chat is an oblivious idiot.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** hey!

 **Ryuko:** I agree that Chat is an oblivious idiot.

 **PurrfectlyPawsome:** did you seriously log on just to say that?

 **Ryuko:** I had some free time so I signed in and saw Pegasus’ message. It was a purrfect opportunity.

 **Ryuko:** I believe I used that pun correctly.

 **Ryuko:** Why isn’t anybody responding?

 **Ladybug:** You broke them all ryuko

 **Ladybug:** chat and I were patrolling since it’s a Saturday and we were bored

 **Ladybug:** he’s sobbing on a roof

 **NinjaTurtle:** can confirm rena is also crying

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** SHES TOO PRECIOUS AEWLKSFDJNV

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** I hear violent sobbing. I think it might be one of you.

 **LesBEEan:** oh good lord chat why are u crying on my roof

 **Ladybug:** !no identities!

 **LesBEEan:** nobody knows which roof he’s crying on

 **LesBEEan:** plus u two know anyway so…

 **Ladybug:** as long as nobody in this chat sees him crying on a roof we’re good


	3. Cheese

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kwamis hijack the chat, Honeybee connects the dots, and Pegasus is... up to something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Way to procrastinate, Phi. Just- way to go. I am evidently terrible at writing multi-chaptered fics. I have a thing all plotted out, but I'm still working on writing it and it's just all one very large mess.

**Direct Messages @Honeybee @Ladybug**

(2:37 pm)

 **Honeybee:** hey

 **Honeybee:** uh

 **Honeybee:** i know u said to tell u if we figured out anyone else’s identities

 **Honeybee:** except i kinda know who everyone is now?

 **Ladybug:** oh fuck

 **Ladybug:** ok chloe gimme a moment to scream into a pillow I’ll get back to you I promise

 **Honeybee:** sure

(3:02 pm)

 **Ladybug:** alright I’m good

 **Ladybug:** well kinda I’m still panicking

 **Honeybee:** don’t worry me too

 **Ladybug:** It’s not that I don’t trust you, it’s just that it’s so weird for someone to know? Other than the guardian ofc

 **Honeybee:** all the ships and lovesquares are literally driving me nuts

 **Ladybug:** I have no clue what you’re talking about?

 **Honeybee:** how did u feel abt the chat shipping both hero u and civilian u with chat noir

 **Ladybug:** oh yeah that ugh

 **Ladybug:** why can’t they understand that I don’t like him that way???

 **Ladybug:** plus they all know marinette likes Adrien jeez

 **Honeybee:** oh my god im gonna go gray because of this

 **Ladybug:** ?

 **Honeybee:** i mean

 **Honeybee:** i agree with u that they shouldn’t force u to be with him just because ur partners and stuff

 **Honeybee:** but what if he’s not the kind of person u think he is under the mask?

 **Honeybee:** the same way marinette is clumsier, more shy and awkward and stuff

 **Ladybug:** don’t forget insecure

 **Honeybee:** im just saying, he could also be socially awkward and shy

 **Ladybug:** nah I can’t see chat’s civilian form being anything like that lol

 **Ladybug:** he’s like the exact opposite of Adrien you know what I mean

 **Honeybee:** why do i even bother

* * *

**#main**

(3:13 pm)

 **PurrfectlyPawsome** has renamed themselves **Camembert**

 **Camembert:** sugarcubeeeee

 **Camembert:** he won’t feed me cheese

 **Camembert:** help

 **Pegasus:** Chat, are you feeling alright?

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** youre not chat

 **Ladybug:** oh hi plagg is that you

 **Camembert:** CHEESE!!!!!!!

 **Ladybug:** hold on lemme get tikki

 **Camembert:** yes bring me sugarcube

 **Ladybug:** plagg! you know you’re not supposed to take your holder’s phone!

 **Camembert:** he wont feed me cheeseeee

 **Camembert:** anyway, he won’t know he’s at an event

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** uh can someone explain what is going on

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** i have no clue

 **Ladybug:** oh I’m ladybug’s kwami, tikki and @Camembert is plagg, chat’s kwami

 **MonkeyMaster:** nice to meet u plagg and tikki

 **NinjaTurtle:** sup dudes

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** trixx says hi!!!

 **LesBEEan:** pollen sends her regards.

 **Ladybug:** hi trixx! hi pollen!

**Camembert:** _CHEESE._

**ICanSeeYourFuture:** hi tikki and plagg

 **hiss:** if possible, could you say hello to sass for me?

 **Ladybug:** oh! About that

 **Ladybug:** this is ladybug again, btw

 **Ladybug:** I can arrange visits with ur kwamis if u want

 **Ladybug:** it cant happen too often, but I could stop by ur homes with your kwamis so u can say hi

 **Ladybug:** or I could just let them loose in the group chat but I don’t think that’s a great idea lol

 **Pegasus:** I think the visits would be the optimal solution. I would enjoy a visit from Kaalki.

 **MonkeyMaster:** xuppu and me have stuff we need to do

 **hiss:** sass is probably dying to give me another lecture lmao

 **hiss:** i did save up to buy a huge supply of raw eggs if needed

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** can I meet the fluff from this timeline?

 **Ladybug:** sure bunnyx! And king monkey- you can prank, but nothing drastic!

 **Ryuko:** I have a break during practice and just saw the messages. If it is possible, I would like to see Longg again too.

 **Ladybug:** done. I’ll dm you guys to work out times and dates.

 **MonkeyMaster:** thanks lb!

 **hiss:** we really appreciate it.

 **Camembert:** where’s my cheese

* * *

**Direct Messages @Pegasus @Ladybug**

(11:03 pm)

 **Pegasus:** I believe I have some valuable information, but I’d like to test my hypothesis with my miraculous.

 **Pegasus:** this could be a major breakthrough.

 **Ladybug:** I trust your judgement. I’m lending it to you for the week, I’ll drop it off tomorrow at 4:15 pm. That can also be your visit with Kaalki. Sound good?

 **Pegasus:** Perfect.


	4. plagg! what did you do?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Plagg brings some more chaos into the group chat, and Ladybug goes off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wait I'm posting again? What?

**#main**

(10:14 am)

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** ew what is this username

 **Camembert:** I don’t know ask your holder

 **hiss:** I do not think you should be using your wielder’s phones during the school day to communicate.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** oh shut up sass you’re doing it too

**LesBEEan** has renamed themselves **Pollen**.

**Pollen:** Greetings, fellow kwami

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** Hi pollen!

 **Camembert:** ooh I have an idea

 **hiss:** I do not think this will end very well.

 **Camembert:** Tikki can you make me admin

 **Camembert:** @Ladybug

 **Camembert:** @Ladybug

 **Ladybug:** Why do you need to be admin, Plagg?

 **Camembert:** please sugarcube

**[Admin]Ladybug** has made **Camembert** an admin.

**Camembert:** yay

**[Admin]Camembert** has added **Hawkmoth** to the chat.

 **[Admin]Camembert** has added **Mayura** to the chat.

**LadyNoir4Ever:** PLAGG NO

 **Pollen:** Plagg!

 **hiss:** this is not good

 **Ladybug:** Plagg! No!

**[Admin]Ladybug** has removed **Camembert** ’s admin powers.

**MonkeyMaster:** hey wassup guys

 **MonkeyMaster:** oh shit the kwamis just added the villains to the chat

 **MonkeyMaster:** I should not be texting in class anyway byeeeeee

 **Hawkmoth:** What is this?

 **Hawkmoth:** Mayura!

 **Mayura:** I believe this is a superhero group chat, sir.

 **Hawkmoth:** Then why are we in it?

 **Camembert:** oops

 **Hawkmoth:** I resent the name of this group chat. I demand you change it immediately!

 **Ladybug:** Everyone get off your holder’s phones!

 **Hawkmoth:** What why is everyone going offline?

 **Mayura:** The kwamis are exiting the chat, sir.

 **Hawkmoth:** No! Come back and change the chat name!

* * *

(3:01 pm)

 **Ladybug:** you have got to be kidding me right now

 **Camembert:** what’s up m’lady?

**Camembert** has changed their name to **Purrince**.

**Ladybug:** what’s up?

 **Ladybug:** WHAT IS UP?

 **Ladybug:** not only did our kwamis hijack the chat

 **Ladybug:** but Plagg added HAWKMOTH and MAYURA to it!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** oh fuck im changing my password

 **hiss:** well looking back, sass was pretty responsible so I’ll give him an extra boiled egg I guess

 **NinjaTurtle:** this is why wayzz is better than all of your kwamis

 **Purrince:** Oh. I’m removing Plagg’s camembert privileges for a week.

 **Hawkmoth:** Oh good you’re active.

 **Hawkmoth:** I demand you change the chat name immediately, Ladybug!

 **Ladybug:** Fuck off dickhead

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** well rip she’s busted out the curse words

 **Pollen:** dang it pollen changed my name

 **Pollen:** anyway fuck you hawkmoth

 **Pollen:** oh wait- nobody wants to hA

 **Mayura:** That is a bit of a sensitive topic.

 **Hawkmoth:** Change the chat name.

 **Ladybug:** what’s the magic word?

 **Hawkmoth:** Are you serious?

 **Ladybug:** no, I’m Ladybug.

 **Purrince:** lmao she got you good

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** ooh bringing out the dad jokes now

 **MonkeyMaster:** rip

 **Hawkmoth:** Fine.

 **Hawkmoth:** Can you PLEASE change the chat name?

 **Ladybug:** Sure!

**[Admin]Ladybug** has renamed the chat **hawkmoth is a little bitch**.

**Hawkmoth:** Hey!

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** LMAO

 **hiss:** vv true tho

 **Hawkmoth:** Mayura! Change it to something else!

 **Mayura:** I cannot do that, sir.

 **Hawkmoth:** Fine. I’ll do it myself.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** ???

* * *

**#akuma**

(3:41 pm)

 **Hawkmoth:** Haha take that!

 **Ladybug:** akuma at the Trocadero.

 **Ladybug:** powers are changing the names of anything it wants to.

 **Ladybug:** really? This is solidifying my belief that you’re a little bitch, btw.

 **Purrince:** be there in a min

 **Pollen:** abt three mins away

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** two mins

 **NinjaTurtle:** four minutes. On the other side of paris.

* * *

**#main**

(4:16 pm)

 **Hawkmoth:** Nooooooo!

 **Ladybug:** seriously? You gave the poor guy a neon green and orange suit? The fuck is wrong with your fashion sense?

 **Hawkmoth:** Nothing! I will let you know that my fashion sense is amazing!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** pffft yeah right

 **MonkeyMaster:** Xuppu tells you to piss yourself. Her words, not mine.

 **Ladybug:** Don’t even get me started on the monstrosity that was Bubbler.

 **Ladybug:** the primary colors? Really?

 **Pollen:** yes Ladybug you tell him!

 **Ladybug:** I can’t believe I’m gonna actually compliment this guy, but

 **Ladybug:** Go read ‘The Basics of Design’ by Gabriel Agreste

 **Hawkmoth:** …

 **Ladybug:** the man is a shitty human being but at least he’s a good designer

 **Mayura:** I shall order a copy right away, sir.

 **Hawkmoth:** Mayura! Not you too!


	5. goodbye hawkmoth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chat says bye to Hawkmoth and Mayura, Ladybug wants to bring Aspik into the chat, Chat Noir wants to add Multimouse, the squad plans a hangout, and Pegasus has a breakthrough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> three days in a row? what am I doing with my life?

(10:04 pm)

 **Ladybug:** So I was debating whether or not to make a new, secure group chat for patrol and stuff

 **Ladybug:** Since this one has obviously been compromised thanks to our kwamis

 **Ladybug:** And then I realized that it’s not necessary.

 **Hawkmoth:** So you’ll keep this chat and learn of all your plans and patrol routes?

 **Purrince:** M’lady no! Continuing to use this chat is a terrible idea!

**Pollen** has renamed themselves **LesBEEan.**

**LesBEEan:** seconded.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** continued use of a compromised chat is not a good move, LB

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** is future me stopping you from doing this rn? Because she should be.

 **Ladybug:** Who said I was going to continue letting the chat be compromised?

 **Hawkmoth:** What?

**[Admin]Ladybug** has kicked **Hawkmoth** from the chat.

 **[Admin]Ladybug** has kicked **Mayura** from the chat.

**Ladybug:** There. Problem solved.

 **Purrince:** YES! NO MORE HAWKMOTH!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** celebration timeee

 **LesBEEan:** Party on the tower instead of patrol? I’ll bring snacks

 **NinjaTurtle:** that sounds great n all but we need to patrol

 **Ladybug:** Carapace is right. You can bring snacks, but we’ll still be patrolling afterwards.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** compromise? Fine by me.

 **Purrince:** snack hangout and patrol everyone! Meet at the Eiffel tower in ten minutes!

 **Ladybug:** the temporary holders have their kwamis rn, so you guys can join if you want.

 **MonkeyMaster:** I’ll be there

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** Fluff says it’s okay. First outing as Bunnyx woo

 **hiss:** sure. Homework can suck it

 **Pegasus:** I suppose I can spare a few hours from my research

 **Ryuko:** I believe I can make it as well.

 **Purrince:** Yes! We got the whole crew!

 **Ladybug:** well, not everyone. Do you think we should invite Aspik into the chat?

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** who dat

 **hiss:** he was the previous snake holder. It didn’t work out, and that’s how I got the miraculous.

 **NinjaTurtle:** oh

 **Purrince:** well uh I’m sure he’s vv busy with his civilian life and stuff

 **Purrince:** but by that logic, we should invite Multimouse! She did an awesome job with kwamibuster!

 **Ladybug:** I’ll ask them both if they want to join on their civilian phones, since they don’t currently hold miraculous

 **LesBEEan:** who’s multimouse?

 **Purrince:** my Purrincess! She wielded all the miraculous at once to defeat kwamibuster! She’s super awesome!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** ooh I sense a new ship

 **Ladybug:** … Anyway, I’m heading to the Tower. Cya.

* * *

**Direct Messages @Honeybee @Ladybug**

**Honeybee:** Am I right in assuming you’re Multimouse?

 **Ladybug:** how?

 **Honeybee:** I’m not that stupid. Nobody else could possibly wield them all at once, especially not a random civilian you picked

 **Honeybee:** plus, Chat calls you his Purrincess. That is adorable

 **Ladybug:** yeahhh sure but I don’t like Chat Noir in that way

 **Honeybee:** so Chat knows Multimouse’s identity?

 **Ladybug:** yeah I used Multifox to cast an illusion and make it look like multimouse detransformed because Chat was getting suspicious

 **Ladybug:** so now he thinks marinette can’t possibly be ladybug since she’s multimouse and he saw the two of them together

 **Honeybee:** Smart. Since you won’t be using Aspik again, can I take a guess?

 **Ladybug:** uh sure

 **Honeybee:** Adrien.

 **Ladybug:** yeah, he apparently tried like 25000 times and still couldn’t save me so he gave it up.

 **Ladybug:** I guess he just wasn’t right for the snake

 **Honeybee:** yeah no duh

 **Ladybug:** ?

 **Honeybee:** forget I said anything. Let’s stop texting and get to the tower.

* * *

**Direct Messages @Pegasus @Ladybug**

(2:56 am)

 **Pegasus:** I believe we can track Hawkmoth and Mayura with our devices when they are transformed, the same way we can track our allies.

 **Ladybug:** oh my god

 **Ladybug:** Pegasus you are a genius.

 **Pegasus:** the discovery makes the lack of sleep worth it.

 **Ladybug:** hold on wait a moment

 **Ladybug:** GO TF TO SLEEP MAX WHY ARE YOU AWAKE

 **Pegasus:** I could say the same for you Ladybug

 **Ladybug:** that’s because i

 **Ladybug:** wait

 **Ladybug:** I have no good answer for that

 **Ladybug:** let’s just both log off and sleep lmao

 **Pegasus:** agreed.


	6. in which people are tired af

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> everyone wants to go to sleep, but it seems the world is working against them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just remembered I haven't updated this since July so here's a chapter full of them doing dumb stuff.

**#main**

(2:16 am)

 **MonkeyMaster:** um

 **MonkeyMaster:** help

 **MonkeyMaster:** i kind of did something

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** it’s literally 2 in the goddamn morning why are you awake?

 **MonkeyMaster:** why are YOU awake?

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** because YOU woke me up!

 **MonkeyMaster:** oh

 **MonkeyMaster:** anyway, xuppu and I thought it’d be a good idea to climb all the way up the Eiffel tower

 **MonkeyMaster:** and now I’m kind of stuck at the very tippy top

 **MonkeyMaster:** like my magic suit got caught on the pointy bit?

 **NinjaTurtle:** dude is that even possible?

 **NinjaTurtle:** it’s magic

 **MonkeyMaster:** idk xuppu probably thought it’d be funny

 **MonkeyMaster:** but I’ve been stuck here, swinging back and forth in the wind, for an hour and a half now

 **MonkeyMaster:** and I’m getting kinda hungry

 **MonkeyMaster:** the bug I ate when it ventured too close to my mouth wasn’t very filling

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** what the actual fuck

 **LesBEEan:** it is two am and I demand that you stop texting each other so I can get my beauty sleep without this infernal buzzing

 **NinjaTurtle:** …you could put your phone on do not disturb

 **LesBEEan:** hmm what’s that you’re cutting out I must be going into a tunnel

 **MonkeyMaster:** uh guys?

 **MonkeyMaster:** still stuck on the Eiffel tower here?

 **Ladybug:** I’m coming, King Monkey

 **Ladybug:** Be there in about ten minutes. Need coffee first.

 **MonkeyMaster:** oh thank goodness

 **MonkeyMaster:** I really need to pee

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** tmi. Just- way too much information.

* * *

**#akuma**

(2:38 am)

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** akuma by Notre Dame. It’s Mr. Pigeon again.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** why is Monsieur Ramier even awake at this hour to get akumatized?

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** why is Hawkmoth awake at this hour to akumatized people?

 **Ladybug:** Just freed King Monkey. He will not be joining us, as he needs to ‘empty my bladder before I pee on Xuppu and he actually murders me.’ ETA six minutes.

 **LesBEEan:** LB, I am officially going to murder Gabriel Agreste

 **LesBEEan:** whoops I mean hawkmoth autocorrect am I right?

 **Purrince:** four minutes. Sorry for the late-ish reply, Plagg was demanding extra cheese for waking up at this time.

 **Purrince:** who gives me extra cheese for doing this? I need my beauty sleep too, you know.

* * *

**#main**

(2:46 am)

 **Ladybug:** now, normally, I wouldn’t do this, but I have been awake for the last forty-eight hours due to a combination of things in both my civilian and hero lives.

 **Ladybug:** so, I’m doing it and none of you can stop me.

**[Admin]Ladybug** has added **Hawkmoth** to the chat.

**Hawkmoth:** what?

 **Ladybug:** fuck you.

**[Admin]Ladybug** has removed **Hawkmoth** from the chat.

 **Ladybug:** there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me? projecting onto LB? more likely than you think.


	7. dun dun dun...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the heroes are a bit confused, Ladybug kicks someone, and Hawkmoth is up to something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ψ(｀∇´)ψ

**#main**

(8:02 am)

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** so @LesBEEan what was that thing abt yesterday?

 **LesBEEan:** ???

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** when you accidentally said Gabriel Agreste instead of hawkmoth

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** and tried to pass it off as autocorrect

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** those words literally aren’t similar at all how?

 **Pegasus:** it was because the author wanted to fuck with people’s heads.

 **LesBEEan:** what

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** what

 **hiss:** what

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** what

 **Ladybug:** what

 **Purrince:** what

 **NinjaTurtle:** what

 **MonkeyMaster:** what

 **Pegasus:** I… don’t know what that was.

 **Pegasus:** It was as if my fingers had a mind of their own.

 **Pegasus:** Almost like somebody made me write that.

 **Ladybug:** Pegasus, how long has it been since you slept?

 **Pegasus:** Only sixty-eight hours. I just started smelling colors. Why?

 **Ladybug:** GO TO SLEEP CHILD

 **Purrince:** you say that as if you’re so much older than us

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** but LB is technically the mom of this group because she was one of the og heroes

 **Purrince:** does that make me your daddy?

 **LesBEEan:** nO

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** NO

 **hiss:** no

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** no!

 **Pegasus:** no.

 **NinjaTurtle:** nope

 **MonkeyMaster:** nopity nope nope

 **Ladybug:** eww nooo

 **Purrince:** (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

 **Ladybug:** please delete that from existence.

 **Purrince:** n̶̢̘̲̠͔̜̊̈́̇͛̅̇͆͂̄͆̈́̚̚͠ͅợ̸̧͇̜͉̫̮̦̠͍͚̲̹͊͗̇́̑̋͒̃͛͜͝

 **Ladybug:** stop

 **Purrince:** m̷̡̤͕̱̻͙͓̫̈͛̐̈̋͊̏̉͊̀̃̕̚͜ͅä̷͙͇̭͚̘̖̯̬͉̦̣̤́̈́̿̓́̆̉͒͘͝ķ̴̰͚̔̎͑̎͊͗̅̓̀͗͗̄͗͘̚e̴̢͕̦̜̜̰̋͒͊̊̾̎͗̃̈́ ̸̨̢̧̙͖̟̻̖̭͓̮̺̞̳̽̏̂͜m̵͓̪͔̬̭̎̈͌͛͂̓͗͆͘͝͝͝͠ẻ̸̛̤̣̗͓͈̆̇͊̿̽̈́̑͆͠

 **Ladybug:** fine

**[Admin]Ladybug** has kicked **Purrince** from the chat.

**ICanSeeYourFuture:** ooh she snapped

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** (⊙ˍ⊙)

 **NinjaTurtle:** I’m so glad LB’s on our side.

 **LesBEEan:** ^^^

 **MonkeyMaster:** ^^^

 **hiss:** ^^^

 **Ryuko:** ^^^

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** oh hi Ryuko how are you?

 **Ryuko:** I am well, thank you.

 **Ryuko:** I have no idea what is happening, however.

 **LesBEEan:** don’t worry ryuko

 **LesBEEan:** I’m pretty sure none of us do either

* * *

 **[Admin]Hawkmoth** has created a new group chat.

 **[Admin]Hawkmoth** has renamed the chat ‘ **Operation Hawkmoth Kicks Ass** ’

 **[Admin]Hawkmoth** has added **Mayura** to the chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ψ(｀∇´)ψ


	8. in which hawkmoth tries (and fails epically) and mayura is done™

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chat noir promises to bring ladybug chocolate, the villain chat gains a new member, and pegasus may be possessed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have TEN requests in my inbox. It used to be seven, and I've been answering about one a day on average. 
> 
> Also, the animatic isn't actually going that terribly. huh.

**Direct Messages @Chat Noir @Ladybug**

(8:34 am)

 **Chat Noir:** add me back

 **Chat Noir:** please

 **Ladybug:** -_-

 **Chat Noir:** pretty please

 **Ladybug:** …

 **Chat Noir:** I’ll bring you chocolate next time you have to patrol during that time of the month?

 **Ladybug:** deal. But you’re on thin fucking ice.

 **Chat Noir:** yay uwu

* * *

**hawkmoth is a little bitch**

**#main**

(8:39 am)

 **[Admin]** **Ladybug** has added **Chat Noir** to the chat!

**Chat Noir** has renamed themselves **Purrince.**

**LesBEEan:** using the same nickname?

 **LesBEEan:** how unoriginal

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** welcome back, chat

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** while u were gone, we had a disco party on the Eiffel tower

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** LB brought waffles

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** King Monkey streaked across the stadium naked

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** Viperion became a millionaire by using second chance in poker

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** Carapace and Honeybee had a breakdancing competition

 **NinjaTurtle:** I won, of course

 **LesBEEan:** LIES

 **Purrince:** okay I get it I was not missed

 **Ladybug:** : )

 **Purrince:** =^(

 **Ladybug:** why must you do this to me?

 **LesBEEan:** that nose is cursed

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** ^^^

* * *

**Operation Hawkmoth Kicks Ass**

**#main**

(9:45 am)

 **Mayura:** Sir. What is this?

 **Hawkmoth:** Those infernal heroes had one with a terrible name, so I made a chat for the villains to discuss our secret plans.

 **Hawkmoth:** Besides, I like this name much better than the one the heroes had.

 **Mayura:** Why do we need a chat when there’s only two of us?

 **Hawkmoth:** You are right, Mayura. We should get more allies!

* * *

**hawkmoth is a little bitch**

**#akuma**

(9:48 am)

 **NinjaTurtle:** Gigantitan by the Louvre. Rena n I are holding him off.

 **Purrince:** got it. 3 mins.

 **Ladybug:** 2 minutes.

 **LesBEEan:** ETA 6 minutes.

* * *

**Operation Hawkmoth Kicks Ass**

**#main**

(9:48 am)

 **[Admin]Hawkmoth** has added **Gigantitan** to the chat!

**Mayura:** …

 **Hawkmoth:** I am proud to announce that we have a new ally.

 **Gigantitan:** eidvnsdvjd

 **Hawkmoth:** Stop slobbering on your akuma-phone.

 **Gigantitan:** aeifuxndb

 **Hawkmoth:** I order you to stop!

 **Gigantitan:** xnfowiefkjdgbsdfjwerkljsdhuiodfh

 **Mayura:** Sir, wouldn’t the magical link between you and the akumas you create be faster?

 **Hawkmoth:** No. The heroes use a group chat, so I will too.

 **Gigantitan:** dfierjcamsd

* * *

**hawkmoth is a little bitch**

**#akuma**

(9:49 am)

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** [image sent]

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** uhh guys? Look

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** august got an akuma phone thingy this time

 **Ladybug:** what.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** yup. And all he’s doing is drooling on it.

 **Purrince:** darn I’m still 2 min-hiss away. I wanna see this in person.

 **LesBEEan:** that was a terrible pun chat and you know it.

 **Ladybug:** Keep an eye on him until I get there to capture his akuma.

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** eye for an eye, captain!

 **Purrince:** I’m pretty sure it’s “aye aye, captain!”

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** I meant what I said and said what I meant.

 **LesBEEan:** o_0

* * *

**#main**

(10:00 am)

 **[Admin]Ladybug** has renamed the chat ‘ **Operation Kick Hawkmoth’s Ass** ’.

**Ladybug:** Was getting a bit nostalgic for that name.

 **Purrince:** now that that’s over, when are we gonna get multimouse in the chat, LB?

 **Ladybug:** Oh yeah, and aspik! I almost forgot!

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** yeah, but wHENNNNNN

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** I’d like to meet chat’s purrincess *wink wink*

 **LesBEEan:** yEaH lB, wHeN aRe wE gOiNg tO mEeT mUlTimOuSe?

 **Pegasus:** most likely next chapter, whenever the author decides to update again.

 **MonkeyMaster:** what does that mean

 **NinjaTurtle:** dude what does that mean

 **Purrince:**????

 **Pegasus:** …I think I’m being possessed by a demon cat.

 **Pegasus:** There’s a voice in my brain introducing herself as Phi.

 **Ladybug:** have you gone to sleep yet?

 **Pegasus:** obviously not.

 **Ladybug:** do I need to revoke your miraculous privileges?

 **Pegasus:** …

 **Pegasus:** I am going to sleep now.

**Pegasus** is now offline.

**Ladybug:** there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my brain is constantly high because I'm a lightweight when it comes to caffeine and I like tea. This is what my singular brain cell, Richard, comes up with as a result.


	9. introducing: LB and CN, but in disguise!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Ladybug:** Aspik was the snake holder before Viperion. The rest of you have never met him because all the timelines where he was active were reset.
> 
>  **Purrince:** yep! And Multimouse is the super awesome girl who once wore all the miraculouses at once to defeat Kwamibuster!
> 
>  **ICanSeeYourFuture:** speaking of which, where is she? mouse has been awfully quiet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back. This is the fourth fic I've posted/updated in about fourteen hours and I'm concerned for my own sanity.
> 
> This is why you shouldn't leave me to my own devices on a four-day weekend.
> 
> Also, today's the six-month anniversary of this fic! Hooray!

**Operation Kick Hawkmoth’s Ass**

**#main**

(12:54 pm)

 **[Admin]Ladybug** has added **Aspik** to the chat!

 **[Admin]Ladybug** has added **Multimouse** to the chat!

**Aspik** has renamed themselves **Hissterical**.

**LadyNoir4Ever:** yaaaaay welcome!

 **Hissterical:** Hi!

 **MonkeyMaster:** wait I’m confused

 **MonkeyMaster:** who’s aspik?

 **MonkeyMaster:** and who’s multimouse?

 **Ladybug:** Aspik was the snake holder before Viperion. The rest of you have never met him because all the timelines where he was active were reset.

 **Purrince:** yep! And Multimouse is the super awesome girl who once wore all the miraculouses at once to defeat Kwamibuster!

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** speaking of which, where is she? mouse has been awfully quiet

 **Ladybug:** adsncvdsf

 **NinjaTurtle:** uh dude you okay there?

 **Multimouse:** Hey guys!

 **LesBEEan:** hello multimouse

 **Purrince:** HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** you just missed LB I think

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** she keysmashed and then dropped off the face of the earth

 **MonkeyMaster:** yeah I hope she’s ok

**LesBEEan** has renamed themselves **I am So Done**.

**NinjaTurtle:** ?

 **I am So Done:** you’ll see in time.

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** in TIME, you say?

 **I am So Done:** you’ll probably learn before the others, but still

 **I am So Done:** aHHHHHHHHHH

 **Multimouse:** Hey, where’s Aspik? I thought LB said she was adding him to the chat too?

 **Purrince:** ghalsdf

 **hiss:** oookay then

 **Hissterical:** yo

 **Hissterical:** ew that was weird I’m never saying that again

* * *

**#akuma**

(1:03 pm)

 **MonkeyMaster:** sorry to interrupt y’all but there’s an akuma by the stadium

 **MonkeyMaster:** and it’s got a knife

 **Purrince:** LET ME SEE WHAT YOU HAVE!

 **Hissterical:** A KNIFE!

 **Purrince:** nO-

 **LesBEEan:** haha. Very funny, you two

 **Ladybug:** guys there’s literally an akuma with a knife running around can we save this for later?

 **NinjaTurtle:** omw

 **LadyNoir4Ever:** about 7 mins away ugh

 **Ladybug:** Thank you, Carapace and Rena.

* * *

**#main**

(1:37 pm)

 **Pegasus:** Has anyone else noticed that Chat Noir and Aspik both have puns in the first half of their nicknames?

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** ohhhh yeah

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** PURRince and HISSterical

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** coincidence? I think not

 **Pegasus:** New conspiracy theory- Chat Noir and Aspik are the same person.

 **MonkeyMaster:** hey aspik whaddya have to say about that?

 **MonkeyMaster:** uh aspik?

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** where is he?

 **Pegasus:** The others are fighting that knife akuma, whatever it was called, but Aspik and Multimouse should be available.

 **Pegasus:** Unless they died, but I find that highly unlikely because the akuma only stabbed one person before the heroes got it away from the civilian population, and that stab wound wasn’t even lethal.

 **MonkeyMaster:** bro why are you so morbid

 **Pegasus:** I am simply just stating the facts.

 **hiss:** I resent that aspik also has hiss in his name.

**hiss** has renamed themselves **Viperion.**

**ICanSeeYourFuture:** wow how original

 **Viperion:** words are not my strong suit okay

 **MonkeyMaster:** wHERE ARE ASPIK AND MULTIMOUSE

 **Pegasus:** Off fighting Edward Knifehands or whatever, probably.

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** ? but the news footage doesn’t show any sign of a snake or a mouse?

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** besides, I’m pretty sure viperion still has his miraculous

 **Viperion:** yep

 **Pegasus:** That was a ridiculous notion. I have no idea why I stated that.

 **Pegasus:** Excuse me. I must find a good exorcist.

 **MonkeyMaster:** bye peggy

 **MonkeyMaster:** have fun

 **ICanSeeYourFuture:** please, do not call him peggy.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on [tumblr!](m3owww.tumblr.com)


End file.
